Teagan Summers, Taisa Banx, Presley Maddox — What do Teagan, Taisa and Presley have in common? Beside the fact that they are are all ridiculously attractive, all three of these young ladies have a fondness for watching two men interact sexually. They especially enjoy it if they have the honor of forcing one of these men to choke on the other gentleman's erect penis. Call them crazy, but the sight of a grown man choking and gasping on a large slab of tube steak is just the thing they need in order to get wet. And, believe me, what they want and what they need comes light years ahead of whatever their husbands might need. Those boys are just happy to be in the room while their wife is getting laid.

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Eva, Olivia Saint, Vic Sinister — Put three porn girls together in a room and it's a natural recipe for chaos. In fact some Big Bang Theorists have advanced the notion that enough nuclear energy was created at the mere idea of Eva, Olivia Saint and Vic Sinister some time walking the planet Earth in the future that it begged to be created. You won't be reading this account in the Book of Genesis, however. In the good book you do read some account of Moses tying his ass to a tree and walking ten miles. But Holy Moses, imagine if the asses of Eva, Olivia Saint and Vic Sinister were in his troupe walking the desert. Moses wouldn't have had enough tablets to break at the idea of all the commandments being violated while he was checking out burning bushes. In fact, we can think of a couple that get us rock hard. And you may think of a few yourself checking out these ladies in the video clip.

Tori Taylor, Jasmine Byrne, Bianca Pureheart — There's screwing up, and then there's really screwing up. Really screwing up is throwing a California Highway patrolman the finger while in bumper-to-bumper traffic on the freeway or pissing off an angry mob of machete-wielding Hutus in Rwanda; or, simply, shitting yourself when you thought you were going to be a scamp by sneaking a smelly fart in a posh Beverly Hills restaurant. One time or another we've all done these things. Then there's screwing up, porn chick style. For the most part, girls, especially if they're pretty girls, can get away with almost anything because they're pretty girls. But if they're pretty PORN girls, they can walk around with asses that smell like stale beer or eggs infected with salmonella and guys will think it's cute, because, being guys, they want to get laid and will suck up to the pretty porn girl thinking this might happen. Chances are it won't, but that's beside the point. While you're mulling how stupid you've behaved around women in these contexts, sit back and watch Tori Taylor and company relate some of the dumb ass goings on in their lives. Then think about how cool it might be to fuck them if you had half the chance.

Ashley Long, Ashley More, Noname Jane (formerly Violet Blue) — If you detect your heart galloping and throwing off arrhythmias, that might be the beautiful body of Ashley Long talking to your pecker and not your enfeebled body telling you the end is in sight. Then, again, if your physician's convinced you've got two days left, it's possible that you're not in a rapidly descencing submarine and that all the oxygen around you is being sucked up. This could, indeed, be the big one. Not that it's going to make you feel any better, but physicians have been known to screw up and make bloopers. Except theirs lead to a pile of medical bills that'll bury you before the undertaker gets there. That's why it's nice to be able to watch porn knowing that it doesn't promise world peace, a solution to poverty and hunger or a cure for cancer. Porn is outrageous and entertainingly stupid, and its entertainers are subject to hilarious misadventures. Listen to what Ashley has to say, and if you're gonna go, at least go with a smile on your face.

Lily LaBeau — Lily LaBeau boasts Irish-Panamanian ethnicity which means her potato famine ancestors probably arrived over here by canal. You wouldn't know any of this, of course, if you bumped into Lily, say at the local coffee shop. But once you tried to putting the make on her, you'd realize she's only attracted to swarthy, mustachioed men by the name of Suarez. Granted, this story may or may not be fabricated because with porn chicks who knows what's real or isn't? Nonetheless they can regale you with stories that defy credibility if not actual sense. Lily's got a few of her own yarns to spin, but we'd prefer to see her in action wondering if her ass hole smelled like corned beef and cabbage. Anyways, this video clip gives you a little sampling of both.